Life in a Bind – BPD and me

My therapy journey, recovering from Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I write for , for Planet Mindful magazine, and for Muse Magazine Australia, under the name Clara Bridges. Listed in Top Ten Resources for BPD in 2016 by

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The Answers to More Questions You’d Like to Ask your Therapist

This is a fantastic follow-up post to Dr Stein’s “Five things you wanted to know about your therapist but were afraid to ask: The answers”, which I reblogged in November 2014. In the November post, Dr Stein wrote a response to blogger SpaceFreedomLove, who had written about the questions she really wanted to ask her therapist. Those questions prompted a whole host of questions by other bloggers who really related to her words, and in this post, Dr Stein addresses some of those further questions.

I find it fascinating – and I wonder, cheekily, if Dr Stein does too(!) – that different bloggers, myself included, posed quite a different set of questions. The questions we ask can be quite revealing of ourselves, our circumstances and our preoccupations. Dr Stein’s posts have revealed aspects of how he felt about his work as a therapist and how he felt about his clients. What have our questions revealed about us? Despite their apparent differences, are there some obvious threads? Is there one key question or concern, or perhaps a small set of them, underlying all of these other questions?

Dr Stein has tantalisingly said that he will be addressing more of those questions in future, and I am very much looking forward to the next post. In the meantime, I hope you find this instalment as fascinating and informative as I did!

Dr. Gerald Stein


Last autumn I wrote a post in response to Spacefreedomlove’s five questions she’d love to ask her therapist. I will try to answer a few more now, those from Jay at Who are You Calling Sensitive?

1) Do you ever dream about me like I dream about you? 2) Is it really easy to limit your thoughts and feelings (both positive and negative) about me to our one weekly session or do these spill over? 3) What do you most love and loathe about our therapy relationship? 4) Is being a therapist just a job or is it a big part of who you are? 5) How on earth do you manage to get all your needs met outside therapy with long working hours and don’t you just want to chat the ears off your friends and family because you’ve been relatively quiet during the day? 6) Do you feel…

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Five Things You Wanted to Know About Your Therapist but were Afraid to Ask: The Answers

A couple of weeks ago I reblogged a post by ‘Spacefreedomlove‘ called ‘Five things you always want to ask your therapist but are afraid to ask‘. This post, by Dr Gerald Stein, gives a therapist’s perspective on those questions and some answers. As Dr Stein notes, therapists are trained not to reveal too much of themselves – this is true of my own therapist, as it is of so many others. I therefore often find therapists’ blogs useful, as they give me more of a sense of what my own therapist might be thinking or feeling, or the approaches she might be using. Dr Stein has the advantage of being able to ‘reveal’ a little more of himself as he is retired from practice, and his blog is full of a vast array of interesting, thought provoking and humorous material!

Dr. Gerald Stein

psihoterapie-validTherapists sometimes reveal themselves despite their training not to. For example, in psychoanalytic treatment, Freud made himself a blank slate. He thought the patient’s troubles would become evident if he didn’t intrude upon the process. Remember, Freud sat behind the patient lying on the couch. Sigmund’s facial expressions and body language could not be observed. He said little, instead encouraging the analysand’s free association of thoughts. Then, if the client displayed positive or negative feelings about Herr Doktor Freud, the psychiatrist believed it due to underlying unresolved issues, usually about mom or dad. The heart of the problem having thus been uncovered, Dr. Freud could begin his “heart” surgery.

Still, patients wish to know “personal” things about the mysterious humanoid who treats them and will comment on the imbalance in unfolding that which is most intimate: the therapist gets to ask, the patient mostly does not. Spacefreedomlove, a provocative…

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